Real Men, Real Woman, Real Dates and flowers, too!

In light of the recent Women’s March on Washington I have witnessed several post on Facebook of other women protesting and some supporting said march! Madonna and Ashley Judd have specifically been brought to the forefront of this march due to their radical comments!

My niece recently posted this on Facebook and I am assuming her post was sparked by the Women’s March on Washington!








Now, I read this I thought to myself, “wow, my husband did 2 of these 3 things! And still does one of them (opens my doors)!”

Let me explain; my husband and I were set up on a blind date by my brother-in-law! Our first meeting, on a Friday night, consisted of me coming to his house with my BIL and sister, and from there we would proceed to our destination. We arrived, introductions were made, we sat for few minutes and chatted; then, as we were getting ready to leave, Lance (my blind date) suggested that we drive separately so he and I could talk and get to know each other. I was good with that so we started walking toward his truck. And lo and behold, what did he do?  He walked me to the passenger side of the vehicle, opened my door and helped me in. (He had a Ford F250 with big wheels and tires. It was somewhat high off the ground).  Now, I could have been offended by this, because I am women after all, but I was not; actually, I was quite impressed that he would even entertain the gesture. When we finally arrived at our destination, Mariah’s Restaurant, he did not open my door. Not any fault of his though! I did not wait to see if he would come open my door or help me out. I flung open my door and helped myself out, I am women after all!  However, before I could get completely out of the truck, he was there, with his hand out! How stupid of me, I should have waited. We approached the restaurant door, and guess what, he opened that door too and waited for me to go in first! We ordered, we ate and then then the waitress brought our check to the table! Guess what? He paid for my supper!! We arrive back as his home. We sit and chat a while longer and then I, my sister and BIL leave! The next day (Saturday) around 3:00 he calls me and tells me how much he enjoyed my company and ask me out for a second date for the following Friday night; he ask me if 6:00 is an okay time for him to pick me up. Of course, I accepted and agreed. Friday night arrives; at 5:50 he comes rolling in my driveway. He doesn’t blow the horn to let me know he’s there and I should come on and get in to leave. No, instead he walks to my door, knocks and asked if I am ready to go! The the same scenario ensues, he takes me on a real date and opens doors! He brings me home, we chat for a while, he leaves! I know I have bragged on my blind date quite a bit, but I will have to say he is a gentleman that is now my husband. I attribute his respectfulness towards me as the way he was raised. You see, if we want our boys to be gentlemen, we have to raise them that way! However, at the same level, if you are raising girls, you have to raise them to respect themselves and then demand that same respect from gentleman callers!

So, my question is, why would my niece post this?  Perhaps she has never been on a “real” date; she has never had anyone open a door for her nor has she ever had anyone to bring her flowers for no reason. In my opinion (and yes, I know what opinions are like) the post should read, “Can we bring back REAL men taking REAL women on REAL dates, opening ALL doors for them and bringing flowers for no reason…”

What is a REAL man? In my opinion (yes, I know what opinion are like) REAL men should respect women. They should open all doors for all women, not just “their” women. They should open doors for strangers because it shows they were raised to respect women! They should ask a girl out on a date and then go to her house to pick her up. Meet her parents. Open her car door, help her in, then shut the door. Pay for her supper. Pay for the movie. Have her back home at a decent hour (no later than 11:00). Open her car door and help her out. Walk her to the door to say goodnight. Respect her space. Don’t expect anything in return. Ask before you kiss; just a peck on the cheek will be good enough for the first date! He should look presentable for the date and for her parents. He should be dressed in neat clothing (tuck in that shirt tail and put on a belt) with combed hair (no hats allowed), oh, and clean up that vehicle too; no women wants to ride in a dirty vehicle! He should NEVER expect her to meet him anywhere for said date! And if she suggest that, then forget the date, she’s hiding something or doesn’t want to be tied down to returning home at a decent hour! You don’t need this kind of girl! And lastly, if you like her, bring her flowers for no reason at all! Mom’s and Dad’s teach your boys these things so they will make you proud.

The Bible tells us that men should be humble and teachable.

Proverbs chapter 9 versus 9-10

9 Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.

10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.

To be honest:  Proverbs chapter 15 versus 2-5

2 He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness, and speaketh the truth in his heart.

3 He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doeth evil to his neighbour, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbour.

4 In whose eyes a vile person is contemned; but he honoureth them that fear the LORD. He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not.

5 He that putteth not out his money to usury, nor taketh reward against the innocent. He that doeth these things shall never be moved.

To be Selfless: Ephesians Chapter 5 versus 25-28

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

To be able and willing to provide: 1 Timothy Chapter 5 verse 8

8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

To protect: 1 Peter 3:7

7 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

What is a REAL woman? A real women will respect herself and the way she presents herself! When my sister and I were growing up our mother made sure we were covered! And what I mean by covered is, no dresses or shorts so short that we were showing butt. No shirts cut so low that we were showing cleavage. As a matter of fact, when we went shopping for dresses or shorts we had to try them on and then bend over. If said garment showed anything inappropriate we could not have it! No clothes to tight; no clothes to short; no clothes that were indecent; we were to respect our bodies and not show it off to everyone! However, in today’s society girls are totally different! I have never seen so much butt and cleavage in all my life! And all the excuses from Mom’s about their daughters clothing and how they dress; really!!  Mom’s be like, “Well, you just can’t find anything else!” YES YOU CAN, if you look for it!  “She has such long legs, that’s why her dress looks so short!” Legs have NOTHING to do with how short that dress is! You, Mom, do not have to buy that dress for your long legged daughter! If she has long legs find a longer dress! “Well, that’s what all the girls are wearing!” Sooooo, if all the girls are running around drinking, partying, having sex and babies then you want your daughter to these things as well? I didn’t think so!

Mom’s and Dad’s, it is your responsibility to make sure your daughter is dressed respectively while she is under your watch, care and protection! If you want your daughter to be treated with respect and dignity, have “real” dates, have car doors opened for her and flowers sent for no reason at all, then teach her to respect herself and to be dignified. Teach her to dress modestly and cover herself. I was once told (by a guy) that if {she} will show “it” to me, then {she} will show “it” to anyone! He lost all respect for her by the way she dressed and acted.  Mom’s and Dad’s, how do you expect your daughter to be treated any differently than the way she acts or dresses?

The Bible instructs us on how we, as women, should act and dress.

1 Timothy chapter 2 versus 9-10 says this:

9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

1 Corinthians Chapter 16 versus 17-20 says this:

17 But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.

18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?

20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

Now, while I do not feel that women/girls should be dressed from head to toe with all aspects of skin covered, I do feel that we, as women, should represent ourselves in a fashion that demands we be treated with respect and dignity!

Proverbs 31 sums up just how women are supposed to conduct themselves! Look it up!

What is a REAL date? A real date is all of the above. A gentleman calls upon a young lady and ask her to accompany him for dinner and a movie perhaps. She accepts if she is so inclined to do so. He sets a date and time and seeks approval from her for said date and time. He arrives on time for the date (yes, he may have to wait on the girl to finish preparing for the date, but this will be just enough time for the parents to find out what kind of boy their daughter is going out with!) When she finally arrives to leave, he rises and greets her, walks her to the door, opens it for her, dismisses himself from the parents and leaves. He opens the car door for her, helps her in, closes the door and off they go. He takes her to a nice restaurant, opens all doors and pulls her chair out to be seated. Pays for dinner, expecting NOTHING in return. Still opening all doors they arrive at the movies. He pays – ALWAYS! Leave movie, maybe stop for ice cream, if it’s not too late. Have her home my 11:00 p.m.  Walk her to the door, ask for a kiss, don’t just assume. If she says yes, give her a little peck on the cheek then say goodnight! If second date ensues, repeat first date methods, only this time, you can actually kiss her! Third date, bring her flowers. If you really want to score points, bring Mom flowers too!

By the way, I have 2 boys, aged 25 and 12; they tuck in their shirt tails and wear a belt! One is married and I’m pretty sure he treats her with respect. The other one, well, he’s still learning!

Thanks for bearing with me!

God Bless,




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